West of Loathing wander events/Region H
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Region H: North Coastal Encounters
Location Discovery
| Encounter Text | Location Unlocked |
|---|---|
| Off to the side of the trail, you see a big billboard reading "ALAMO RENT-A-MULE, THIS WAY." | Alamo Rent-A-Mule |
| Your transponder beeps, indicating a spot to the east of where you're riding now. You nudge <horsename> in that direction, following the signal, until you encounter a cavernous opening in the foothills. | Curious False Mountain |
| Your transponder beeps, indicating a spot to the west of where you're riding now. You spur <horsename> in that direction, and encounter a large hexagonal monolith of El Vibrato material. | Curious Flat Plain |
| You see a sign off to the side of the trail reading "DEEPEST DELVE MINE, 3 MILES AHEAD AND 4 MILES DOWN." You mark the location on your map. | Deepest Delve Mine |
| You see wisps of smoke rising above the pines nearby, and spur <horsename> over to investigate.
The source is a little shop, nestled deep in the forest -- almost as though the proprietor doesn't want customers to find it. |
Halloway's Hideaway |
| Your booze sense tingles. You spur <horsename> toward the source of the disturbance in the liquorsphere, and find a little still hidden in the pines. | Moonshine Still |
| As you're riding along, you're suddenly nearly bowled over by the smell of flowers. You follow your nose (well, technically you direct <horsename> to follow your nose) and find a delightful little home nestled among the trees. | Olive Garden's Homestead |
Non-Combat Events
| Type | Encounter | Conditions | Options |
|---|---|---|---|
 ∗ |
<horsename> gets a little skittish, and a few moments later you understand why -- a low, Nordic drone signals the existence of a nearby hive of Viking bees.
You hop down and follow your ears to the source. |
Repeatable |
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∗ |
You slam on <horsename>'s brakes because you're pretty sure you just saw a floating banana.
When you hop down to investigate, it turns out it's not floating, but perched precariously atop a thin stalk. Picking it could be risky. |
Repeatable |
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∗ |
You catch a whiff of an especially fragrant pine tree as you're riding down the trail toward your destination.
You park <horsename> next to it and look closer. It appears to be a Northern Moustache Pine! You've heard great things about the sap in these things. |
Repeatable |
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 ∗ |
You find a crate at the side of the road. It has "MINING OR MAYBE FIRST-AID SUPPLIES" stenciled on it. Jeez, make up your mind, crate. | Repeatable |
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∗ |
You find a makeshift grave. The wooden marker has been carved with the epitaph "Not from around here, but a real square little fella". | Repeatable |
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 ∗ |
Your El Vibrato transponder leads you toward a darkened grove of trees.
You steer @horsename@ into it to investigate, and you discover that the reason the grove is dark is because there's one of those El Vibrato monoliths inside it, and the monolith is dark because it's not turned on. That makes sense, right? |
Repeatable [El Vibrato transponder] |
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∗ |
Your path is blocked by a large moose. Although somewhat related to cows, moose are not evil -- they're just jerks, like most of the animal kingdom. They are also quite large. This one is just sort of staring at you and doesn't seem inclined to move. | Repeatable |
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∗ |
A burly lumberjack-looking fellow has set up a table in the middle of the road, with a sign that says "TOLL ROAD: 1 ARM-WRASSLE". He grins widely when he sees you and plants the elbow of his absurdly muscular right arm in the middle of the table. | Repeatable |
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∗ |
You pass through a clearing and see a young goblin carving something into a tree. It appears to say "GOLBINS RULE OK". | Repeatable |
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∗ |
Off the trail's shoulder, you see some ancient petroglyphs carved into a rock. | Repeatable |
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∗ |
You come to the banks of a large river, swollen with recent rainstorms and seasonal snowmelt from the northern mountains. You may: | Repeatable |
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∗ |
Your eye catches a small wooden object at the side of the trail, and you stop to take a closer look. Turns out some kid lost their bandalore (what you would call a yo-yo, but the modern patent for that won't happen for another couple decades). | Repeatable |
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Combat Events
| Type | Encounter | Conditions | Non-Combat Options | Combat Option | ||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
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A tree next to you explodes in a shower of splinters. You turn your head slightly to regard a stump with a hatchet sticking out of it, then turn the other way to regard the large bear that threw it at you.
On second glance, you see that he isn't a bear at all, but a big muscular man with a giant beard and bearskin pants. |
One-time |
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Well, that's odd. There's a tree stump here with a raw plucked chicken sitting on it, on a plate. You dismount and start walking over to take a closer look at it, when a shot rings out. The chicken jumps a foot into the air, on fire, and lands back on the plate -- perfectly roasted.
You slowly turn around and see a woman wearing a black chef's hat, blowing smoke from the end of her revolver. |
One-time |
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"Hey! Mister/Lady!"
A young woman with dark bobbed hair and a white apron is standing behind a makeshift wooden counter at the side of the road. Behind her, you can see a campfire and something that looks like a cross between a potbelly stove and a steam engine. |
One-time |
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 ∗ |
With a ghostly shrieking moooooooo, a cow skull wreathed in its own personal blizzard of freezing wind and shards of ice swoops toward you. Inasmuch as its possible to ascribe an emotional state to it, you would guess that emotion to be "upset". | Repeatable |
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∗ |
All of a sudden, you're being attacked by a vaguely cow-shaped ice sculpture, so rough that it could believably have been carved by cows themselves. It's a real surprise, because it isn't clear how that thing can move under its own power. | Repeatable |
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A goblin runs up to you laughing. They're carrying a boulder over their head which is taller than they are. | One-time |
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A strange noise over the next hill makes you pause. It sounded kind of like a gunshot, but less "bang" and more "peeyoww". You creep up to the spot cautiously, and find a goblin fiddling with a large pistol with magical sigils engraved all over it. The goblin seems to be adjusting one of the sigils with a small engraving chisel. | One-time |
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The middle of the woods is not where you would expect to find a goblin with a big pompadour haircut, wearing a spangly sequined suit and cape, and doing a dance that involves a lot of pelvis thrusts and butt-wiggling. But, yeah, that's what you've found. | One-time |
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 ∗ |
A twig snaps in the woods behind you. You catch a moving shadow out of the corner of your eye, but nothing is there. You have the uncanny feeling that you're being followed.
Look, I'm on my way somewhere, can we just cut to the chase? A huge skeleton, much taller than any human and with structure and posture somewhere in between a human and a gorilla, smashes out of the undergrowth and charges at you. |
One-time |
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∗ |
You pass a skeleton with $skelposlow$ hat pulled down to conceal his/her face, hiking northward with a walking stick and large backpack. | One-time |
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∗ |
A skeleton moseys up to you, wearing a leather vest, chaps, and a rancher-style felt hat, bleached white by long years in the sun. He also has a tin star on his lapel that says "TEXAS RANGER". He glares at you with suspicion in his eye sockets, but doesn't say anything. He's missing his jaw, so he probably can't even hiss like most skeletons. | One-time |
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∗ |
You are approached by the shambling skeleton of a man with a lumber axe and a big bushy beard. So it's either the skeleton of a lumberjack, or the skeleton of one of those johnny-come-lately axe and beard fans. | Repeatable |
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You encounter a ghost trapper, by which I mean the ghost of a fur trapper, not someone who traps ghosts. Or, well, maybe he just traps animal ghosts? He does have the ghost of a raccoon on his head. | Repeatable [Pale Horse] |
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 ∗ |
You hear a loud 'hissss!' except it actually sounds more like 'brrrr!', which is your first clue that you're being attacked by a cobrrra.
It's extremely rare to find one so near the desert, considering its far-northern habitat. Maybe that explains why it's so angry. |
Repeatable |
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∗ |
Your transponder bleeps at you, which only means one thing: treasure or a fight!
...Oh, I guess that's really two things. Anyway, this time it turned out to be a fight. Specifically a fight with a large robot. Well, assuming you decide to fight it. |
Repeatable [El Vibrato transponder] |
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